Lavender Days

For me flowers are more than just a complicated combination of Nitrogen, Carbon, and some specifically sequenced genomes. For me they are my life, my memories. For the past six months I have been picking flowers and using them as vessels for memories that have prompted growth and change. Now I have an array of flowers ranging from daisies from amazing weekends to roses from cold rainy days, but the most impactful flower was the very first.

For most it’s just a small, dried up, piece of lavender, but to me it is so much more than a flower. This lavender holds the memory of a day in which I spent hours having meaningful conversations with people that I cherish in order to better understand my complicated emotions.

For nearly the entire summer before senior year, I was scared of losing all the friends I had grown so close to after we graduate. This thought had been tearing me apart and by the last day of summer I had to let it out. I confided these feelings to one of my closest friends, but instead of giving me end all be all advice, he prompted me to talk through my issues holistically and understand my feelings on a deeper level. By 5am the next morning my deep fears of detachment had turned into acceptance and positivity. I came to the realization that the future did not hold a predetermined end to friendships but simply a temporary separation, as well as the need to explore our own paths in order to fully realize our futures.

That day, and that flower, reminds me of the positivity that lies within all situations and that by taking the time to challenge myself to grow I can achieve everything I want in life.

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