Met a girl named Bethany,
two years past on eharmony;
I think she is the one for me.
But every time I ask to meet ‘er,
She says she’s busy with her Career.
Oh, wait! I forgot to say,
Bethany owns 62% of Chevrolet and is BFFs with Kim K.
Desperate to meet my one and only,
I flew to ‘er home in Louis, Kentucky.
But when she answered the door,
My jaw ‘bout dropped to the floor:
It seems Bethany all along,
Was a beer-bellied man named “Bud”
Living in the freezer of an abandoned Fud-Rucker’s.